“For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven.” Ecclesiastes 3: 1
You have no doubt heard the adage “If you want God to laugh tell Him your plans.” On the surface this saying appears to venerate a capricious god undermining any progress we may think we are making on our spiritual path. Nevertheless it serves as a reminder that we often have no control over a situation.
About five months ago I was diagnosed as having Parkinson’s Disease. Like most people with PD I have no idea what caused it, but the disease was probably at work several years before I noticed the symptoms. Since my diagnosis I have gone through nearly every step of the grieving process multiple times. At first I was in denial, insisting on multiple tests to be certain. Now I am mostly at acceptance, with a good measure of anger thrown in every so often to remind me that for better or worse I’m very much a work in progress on a path not of my choosing.
One of the hardest things for me to accept is having to rely more on my life partner as a caregiver. As normal as I try to live my life PD is ever present reminding me I am not in control. I’ve been assured that getting proper medical care and plenty of exercise will go a long way in keeping me relatively healthy for several years to come. I try to remind myself of this when my body doesn’t work as it used to.
Six years ago Tom and I moved from northern California to Hawaii Island. Since that time I have tried to participate with the widespread Quaker community here. The creation of this blog has been part of what I have offered Friends living here and visiting. I know sometimes my blunt words have caused grieve, for which I am sorry, but overall I hope I have also offered reflections that are helpful. Living in Hawaii has been a fruitful season in my life but it is time to consider a change more in line with the increasing demands of my health.
We were surprised that our property sold the first day it was officially on the market. I’m not sure if we were Led through this process or Shoved. My biggest regret is that I will no longer be part of the Keaau Friends Worship Group, which I helped found here on the east side of the island. My hope is that even though it is a small group they will continue offering unprogrammed worship in this area.
“For everything there is a season …” My partner and I hope to move to Gainesville, Florida, where there are extensive resources for people with Parkinson’s Disease. There is also a well-established Quaker Meeting there that meets each week. I hope to become part of this faith community as I discover Openings for new purposes under heaven.
This will probably be my final posting on Big Island Quaker Blog. The question now is do I leave the blog open as an educational resource or take it down altogether? If you have suggestions in this regard I’d love to hear from you.